The Grump Of Horror Reviews ‘The Pining’

After a group therapy meeting, members if the group begin dying. The Detective has only one lead, Father William, the person who ran the group meetings, but he seems reluctant to reveal what happened…

I’ve written all types of reviews before, good ones, bad ones, average ones. Even ranted about certain films from time to time. And yet, despite all that, I’m almost reluctant to review The Pining.

Why, you may ask?

Because I hated every second of it. I mean truly hated it. It’s so badly written, acted, shot and edited that one can’t help feel someone deliberately set out to make a truly awful film. As a result, it feels like a truly easy target to go for and I take no pleasure in writing this.

Before I really get stuck in, I want to, perhaps surprisingly, offer a brief (very brief) moment of defence to the film. When I was sent the screener link, the link took me to what was called, Rough Draft Copy 08. I mention this, only because it might, MIGHT, explain aspects of the problems this film has. If the copy sent to review was unfinished, then, okay, that is the film companies choice and that’s the one I have to base the review around. If they have made changes to the film since that screener link was sent, it’s now too late.

But if Rough Draft Copy 08 is indeed the finished film, then dear God, what were they thinking?

The film is written and directed by Eduardo Castrillo (the writing credit, perhaps not surprisingly, buried in the end credits). As written, it’s a mess. There’s a feel that the film was shot over a long period, with additional scenes added at moments, that were then brought into the mix to see if the story could hang together. At one point, we see a scene of a character coming home. The very next scene, appears to be the previous one, but reshot with a new focus. Why certain characters are killed and some aren’t doesn’t make sense, a fellow minister spends all his time with prisoners about to be executed, that each time we see him another is taken to the chair or however it was done. He’d save the state a fortune at that rate!

Because the story is so disjointed, with characters having very little interaction with others at times, you begin to wonder if, as I said, this film started as one thing, then stopped production, only to resume as another. There’s potentially two, possibly even three story ideas in here, but none are properly developed, with the film not so much having an ending, instead more the filmmaker just giving up.

The cast are awful. Tom Sizemore, from Saving Private Ryan and The Relic (no really, it’s him!) is perhaps the best known actor in the film. But I really can’t believe he chose to make this film. Surely he gets offered better parts? Judging from the expression on his face, along with his performance, I got the feeling, he couldn’t believe he was in this film either. He barely looks awake for the film.

The rest of the cast don’t even fare as well as that. Miguel A. Nunez plays the other minister. He was in Return Of The Living Dead and also Friday The 13th Part 5, now turning up in rubbish like this. The others, including Jackie Dallas, Jonez Cain, Connie Jo Sechrist are just not good at all.

It’s inept, cheap and amateur looking, so badly made, that film students would be embarrassed but the film. It’s confusing, badly put together, never scary, never a mystery, not even good of unintended comedic, so bad it’s good vibe to it.

The Pining is an awful film. It’s a film I wish I could unsee. I said at the beginning, I take no pleasure in writing this and I don’t. But The Pining is one of the worst films I have ever had the misfortune to ever see.

It’s also a film that is about to become a first for me. It’s the first film I’ve reviewed on my own Blogs or elsewhere that doesn’t even get a mark.

Giving a choice between putting bleach in your eyes or watching this film, take the bleach. Yes it’ll hurt, but it’ll mean you never have to watch The Pining.

Just avoid.

Rating: 0 out of 5

About Bill

Founder/Head Writer of The Horrorcist.

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